The real disaster of 2012? Outsourcing.

I took my 13-year-old son to see '2012' a couple of days ago. This is the souped-up disaster movie in which the world ends with all the flamboyant glitz of a Broadway show tune from hell.

The depressing part wasn't the vision of an aircraft carrier dropping messily on the White House or California tipping into the Pacific like a massive tray of finger-food.

No, the dreary part is that when all the world's nations decide to build hi-tech arks to sustain a remnant human population, they outsource the job to China.

Yes, that's right. It's the first American disaster movie in which the big solution is China's can-do attitude.

There's even a line in the movie where the snarky American politician tips his hat to China's pluck and efficiency.

What the hell? Can't we even fantasize about our own industry and self-sufficiency anymore?

It's noteworthy that the American lead in the film is John Cusack.

He's famous for his 1989 portrayal of Lloyd Dobler -- in the film "Say Anything" -- who along with Ferris Bueler ranks as one of the ur-slackers of American society.

Here's his famous quote from that film:

I don't want to sell anything, buy anything, or process anything as a career. I don't want to sell anything bought or processed, or buy anything sold or processed, or process anything sold, bought, or processed, or repair anything sold, bought, or processed. You know, as a career, I don't want to do that.

Right. Very cool. Which is why, two decades later, the Chinese are saving your bacon.